My Friend
by Khalil Gibran
My friend, I am not what I seem. Seeming is but a garment I wear—a
care-woven garment that protects me from thy questionings and thee
from my negligence.The “I” in me, my friend, dwells in the house of silence, and
therein it shall remain for ever more, unperceived, unapproachable.I would not have thee believe in what I say, nor trust in what I do—for my words are naught but thy own thoughts in sound, and my deeds thy own hopes in action.
When thou sayest, “The wind bloweth eastward,” I say, “Aye it doth
blow eastward”; for I would not have thee know that my mind doth
not dwell upon the wind but upon the sea.Thou canst not understand my seafaring thoughts, nor would I have
thee understand. I would be at sea alone.When it is day with thee, my friend, it is night with me; yet even
then I speak of the noontide that dances upon the hills and of
the purple shadow that steals its way across the valley; for thou
canst not hear the songs of my darkness nor see my wings beating
against the stars—and I fain would not have thee hear or see. I
would be with night alone.When thou ascendest to thy Heaven I descend to my Hell, even then thou callest to me across the unbridgeable gulf, “My companion, my comrade,” and I call back to thee, “My comrade, my companion”; for I would not have thee see my Hell. The flame would burn thy eyesight and the smoke would crowd thy nostrils. And I love my Hell too well to have thee visit it. I would be in Hell alone.
Thou lovest Truth and Beauty and Righteousness; and I for thy sake say it is well and seemly to love these things. But in my heart I laugh at thy love. Yet I would not have thee see my laughter. I would laugh alone.
My friend, thou art good and cautious and wise; nay, thou art perfect—and I, too, speak with thee wisely and cautiously. And yet I am mad. But I mask my madness. I would be mad alone.
My friend, thou art not my friend, but how shall I make thee
understand? My path is not thy path, yet together we walk, hand
in hand.
Summary of My Friend
- Popularity of “My Friend”: This poem is often attributed to Khalil Gibran, though no record of its publication exists. It resonates with readers due to its exploration of perception versus reality. The poem portrays a unique dynamic between two friends, highlighting the speaker’s deliberate concealment of their true self, their inclination towards solitude, and a veiled madness. Perhaps the speaker wishes to shield their friend from distress.
- “My Friend”, As a Representative of Duality: The speaker establishes a distinction between themselves and their friend, admitting to constructing a façade to deflect inquiries. The friend appears optimistic and lively, while the speaker resides within an impenetrable silence. The speaker consistently withholds their inner turmoil and suffering, even laughing at the friend’s earnest love for universally accepted virtues. Despite this internal conflict, the speaker walks alongside their friend, maintaining a semblance of harmony and shared experience.
- Major Themes in “My Friend”: Loneliness, the complexities of friendship, and the art of masking are central to this poem. While seemingly a contrast of personalities, the work delves into the universal human tendency to hide our innermost selves, even from ourselves. Gibran masterfully illustrates the ideal self we present to the world, and the imperfections we carefully conceal.
Analysis of Literary Devices Used in “My Friend”
Literary devices empower writers to convey emotions, ideas, and themes effectively, enhancing the reader’s experience. Khalil Gibran skillfully employs various such devices in this poem to illuminate the differences between the speaker and their friend. Let us explore some of these:
- Enjambment: This occurs when a thought or phrase continues from one line to the next without punctuation, creating a flowing rhythm. For example:
“I would not have thee believe in what I say nor trust in what I
do—for my words are naught but thy own thoughts in sound and my
deeds thy own hopes in action.”The line breaks aren’t confined to natural pauses, encouraging a continuous reading experience.
- Symbolism: Gibran uses symbols to represent abstract ideas. “Hell,” in this poem, symbolizes the speaker’s discontent and inner turmoil, while the “garment” represents the façade or false appearance we present to the world to hide our true selves.
- Imagery: Gibran masterfully uses imagery to appeal to the senses. Lines like, “My path is not thy path, yet together we walk, hand in hand,” and “care-woven garment that protects me from thy questionings and thee from my negligence,” create vivid pictures in the reader’s mind. The image of “the flame would burn thy eyesight and the smoke would crowd thy nostrils” is particularly striking.
- Assonance: The repetition of vowel sounds within close proximity. Notice the repetition of the /ou/ sound in “My friend, thou art good and cautious and wise; nay, thou art” and the /ee/ sound in “perfect—and I, too, speak with thee wisely and cautiously.”
- Alliteration: The repetition of consonant sounds at the beginning of words. Examples include the repetition of the /m/ sound in “And yet I am mad. But I mask my madness. I would be mad alone.” and the /w/ sound in “My path is not thy path, yet together we walk, hand in hand.”
- Personification: Giving human qualities to inanimate objects. In the sixth stanza, “the noontide that dances upon the hills” personifies the noontide, attributing it with the human action of dancing.
“Then I speak of the noontide that dances upon the hills and of
the purple shadow that steals its way across the valley.”
Analysis of Poetic Devices Used in “My Friend”
While literary and poetic devices often overlap, certain elements are particularly prominent in poetry. Here’s an analysis of those devices within this poem:
- Stanza: A stanza is a group of lines forming a unit within a poem. “My Friend” consists of ten stanzas, each varying in length, contributing to the poem’s flowing, conversational tone.
- Free Verse: This poem exemplifies free verse, meaning it doesn’t adhere to a strict rhyme scheme or metrical pattern. This allows Gibran to prioritize natural language and emotional expression over formal constraints.
- Tercet: A tercet is a three-line stanza, historically found in Hebrew poetry. In “My Friend”, the third, fourth, and ninth stanzas are all composed of tercets, offering a concise counterpoint to the longer stanzas.
Quotes to be Used
The following lines beautifully articulate the idea that true friendship allows for individuality and doesn’t require complete conformity:
“My friend, thou art not my friend, but how shall I make thee
understand? My path is not thy path, yet together we walk, hand
in hand.”
These words serve as a gentle reminder that embracing differences is a cornerstone of genuine connection.