Welcome, aspiring literary explorers, to a journey into the captivating world of poetry! Today, we delve into a truly unique and thought-provoking piece by Kevin Young, a poem that challenges our perceptions of love, art, and possession. Prepare to have your understanding stretched and your imagination sparked as we uncover the layers of “I Am Trying to Break Your Heart.”
I Am Trying to Break Your Heart
By Kevin Young
I am hoping
to hang your headon my wall
in shame,the slightest taxidermy
thrills me. Fishforever leaping
on the living-room wall,paperweights made
from skullsof small animals.
I want to wearyour smile on my sleeve
& breakyour heart like a horse
or its leg. Weeks of beingbucked off, then
all at once, you’re mine,Put me down.
I want to call you thine
to tattoo mercy along my knuckles. I assassin
down the avenue I hope
to have you forgotten
by noon. To know youby your knees
paralyzed by prayer.Loneliness is a science,
consider the taxidermist’s
tender handstrying to keep from losing
skin, the bobcat grinof the living.
Understanding “I Am Trying to Break Your Heart”: A Summary and Central Idea
Kevin Young’s “I Am Trying to Break Your Heart” is a strikingly unconventional poem that first appeared in his acclaimed collection Dear Darkness (2008). This poem immediately establishes Young as a powerful voice in contemporary poetry, celebrated for his innovative use of form and his fearless exploration of complex emotional landscapes. Far from a traditional declaration of affection, this poem presents a speaker who, with unsettling candor, articulates a desire to inflict heartbreak, not out of malice, but through a peculiar and unsettling form of artistry.
The speaker, who identifies with the profession of a taxidermist, reveals an intention to preserve the beloved, to capture and contain their essence, even as this act is inherently linked to causing pain. The central idea of “I Am Trying to Break Your Heart” revolves around the fraught and often disturbing relationship between love, ownership, and artistic creation. The speaker equates a profound, albeit twisted, form of love with a desire to possess and control. The taxidermist’s craft serves as a potent and chilling metaphor for this impulse. The poem suggests a yearning to immortalize the beloved, yet it unflinchingly acknowledges the inherent violence and destructive potential within such a possessive act. It is a noteworthy piece because it dares to explore the darker, more unsettling facets of human connection, where the desire to dominate and preserve can overshadow mutual affection, making it a truly unforgettable reading experience.
Deep Dive into “I Am Trying to Break Your Heart”: A Comprehensive Analysis
Kevin Young masterfully employs a rich tapestry of literary and poetic devices to craft the unsettling and profoundly thought-provoking experience of “I Am Trying to Break Your Heart.” An in-depth analysis reveals how these techniques contribute to the poem’s unique power and enduring impact.
Imagery and Sensory Details
Young’s poem is replete with vivid and often disturbing imagery that appeals directly to the reader’s senses, creating a palpable atmosphere of unease and macabre fascination. The speaker’s profession as a taxidermist provides a constant source of these striking visuals:
“paperweights made
from skulls
of small animals.”
This image is immediately jarring, juxtaposing the mundane utility of a paperweight with the stark reality of death and mortality. It establishes a sense of the speaker’s peculiar aesthetic, where beauty is found in the preserved remains of life. Similarly, the description of “Fish / forever leaping / on the living-room wall” evokes a sense of unnatural preservation, trapping a moment of vibrant life in a static, artificial state. These images are not merely decorative; they powerfully reinforce the poem’s central themes of control, preservation, and the unsettling blurring of life and death, inviting readers to consider the implications of such a desire.
Figurative Language: Simile and Metaphor
The poem’s emotional impact and thematic depth are significantly enhanced through Young’s skillful use of simile and metaphor, establishing unusual and often unsettling connections.
One of the most striking examples is the simile:
“& break
your heart like a horse
or its leg.”
Comparing heartbreak to the breaking of a horse’s leg is profoundly violent and unsettling. This comparison suggests that the speaker views love, or the object of his affection, as a powerful, untamed force that must be broken or controlled to be truly possessed. It also reduces the beloved to something that can be physically damaged, highlighting a disturbing lack of empathy or a profound, distorted understanding of connection.
Later, the metaphor “Loneliness is a science” establishes a chilling equivalence. This line suggests that loneliness is not merely an emotion to be felt, but a calculated, methodical practice, perhaps even an art form. This reinforces the speaker’s detached, analytical, and almost clinical perspective on emotional states, aligning with the precise, preserving nature of taxidermy.
Structure and Form: Enjambment and Free Verse
The poem’s structure and form are crucial to its unsettling effect. “I Am Trying to Break Your Heart” is written in free verse, meaning it lacks a regular rhyme scheme or a consistent metrical pattern. This deliberate choice allows Young immense control over the rhythm and pacing, emphasizing certain words and phrases while creating a sense of natural, almost conversational, speech. The absence of a rigid formal structure reinforces the poem’s unconventional and unsettling nature, mirroring the speaker’s unpredictable and unique perspective.
Enjambment, the continuation of a sentence or phrase from one line to the next without a grammatical pause, is used extensively throughout the poem. This technique creates a sense of momentum and unease, disrupting the expected rhythm of the verse and forcing the reader to pause and reconsider meaning at unexpected junctures. Consider these lines:
“consider the taxidermist’s
tender handstrying to keep from losing
skin, the bobcat grinof the living.”
The line break after “tender hands” forces a momentary suspension, allowing the image of the hands to linger before the reader learns their true, somewhat disturbing, purpose. This fragmented phrasing mirrors the speaker’s complex and perhaps fractured emotional state, creating a dynamic reading experience that keeps the audience engaged and slightly off-balance.
Word Choice and Tone: Diction and Voice
The poem’s diction, or choice of words, is precise and deliberate, contributing significantly to its complex tone. Young employs a formal, almost archaic tone in places, which creates a stark contrast with the poem’s unsettling subject matter. Words like “thine” (an old form of “yours”) evoke a sense of old-fashioned formality and possessiveness:
“I want to call you thine”
This choice hints at a deeper, more absolute desire for ownership, reminiscent of historical declarations of love and property. The speaker’s voice is one of ironic detachment, possessive desire, and a chilling acknowledgement of pain. The line “Put me down” could be interpreted as a command to the beloved, or perhaps a self-aware plea from the speaker to be stopped from his own destructive impulses. This ambiguity adds to the poem’s unsettling power, as the speaker is not necessarily malicious but undeniably controlling and self-absorbed in his unique artistic vision.
Symbolism in “I Am Trying to Break Your Heart”
Symbolism plays a crucial role in enriching the poem’s thematic layers and allowing for multiple interpretations.
- Taxidermy: This central symbol represents the profound desire to preserve, control, and possess. It embodies the speaker’s artistic impulse to capture and immortalize, but also highlights the inherent violence and artificiality in attempting to freeze life.
- Skulls: The “skulls / of small animals” symbolize mortality, the fragility of life, and the speaker’s comfort with death as a raw material for his art. They represent the ultimate form of preservation, where only the structure remains.
- The Bobcat Grin: The “bobcat grin / of the living” is a particularly potent symbol. It suggests a predatory and unnatural beauty, a frozen expression of wildness that is both captivating and unsettling. It encapsulates the idea that even in preservation, there can be a fierce, untamed essence, or perhaps a hint of the speaker’s own predatory nature in his pursuit of the beloved.
Key Themes Explored in “I Am Trying to Break Your Heart”
Beyond its striking imagery and masterful use of language, “I Am Trying to Break Your Heart” delves into several profound themes that resonate deeply with readers.
Love, Possession, and Control
At its core, the poem explores a distorted, almost predatory, understanding of love. The speaker’s desire is not for mutual affection but for absolute possession and control over the beloved. The act of “breaking” the heart is not merely an emotional wound but a process of taming, akin to breaking a wild horse:
“Weeks of being
bucked off, then
all at once, you’re mine,”
This suggests that love, for the speaker, is achieved through a struggle for dominance, culminating in the beloved’s submission and becoming an object of ownership. The poem challenges conventional notions of love, presenting a darker, more unsettling interpretation where affection is intertwined with a desire to dominate and contain.
Artistry and Violence
The speaker’s profession as a taxidermist serves as a powerful metaphor for the intersection of artistry and violence. The act of preserving life through taxidermy is a creative endeavor, yet it inherently involves death and manipulation. The poem suggests that the speaker’s “art” of breaking hearts is also a form of creation, a way to shape and define the beloved according to his own vision. This theme raises questions about the ethical boundaries of art and the potential for creative impulses to inflict harm, even when driven by a strange form of passion.
The Nature of Pain and Vulnerability
The poem unflinchingly confronts the inevitability of pain in relationships, suggesting that even acts intended to preserve or possess can be deeply destructive. The speaker’s explicit intention to “break your heart” highlights a fascination with vulnerability and the power dynamics inherent in inflicting emotional pain. The line “To know you / by your knees / paralyzed by prayer” suggests a desire to see the beloved in a state of ultimate vulnerability and submission, perhaps as a way to fully comprehend or control their essence. The poem invites reflection on how we perceive and react to the pain of others, and how our own desires can lead to such infliction.
Identity and Transformation
The poem also touches upon themes of identity and transformation, particularly through the lens of the speaker’s desire to reshape the beloved. By “hanging your head on my wall in shame” or wearing “your smile on my sleeve,” the speaker seeks to appropriate and transform aspects of the beloved’s identity into his own trophies or adornments. This suggests a desire to consume or absorb the beloved, making them a part of the speaker’s own being and narrative. The poem explores the unsettling idea that in some relationships, one person’s identity can be profoundly altered or even diminished by another’s possessive desires.
A Lasting Impression
“I Am Trying to Break Your Heart” by Kevin Young is a challenging yet profoundly rewarding poem that invites multiple interpretations and lingers in the mind long after the final line. Its unconventional approach to love, coupled with its striking imagery, masterful use of literary devices, and fearless exploration of complex themes, makes it a standout work within contemporary poetry. This poem serves as a powerful reminder that literature often thrives in exploring the uncomfortable and the unsettling, pushing us to reconsider our assumptions about human connection, art, and the intricate dance between creation and destruction.